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Sep. 10th, 2016

manada

(no subject)

Hey Adam.  I don't know if you look at this blog at all anymore.  Kinda hoping you don't, but either way.

I heard your wedding with Kat was today.   You know what else September 10th was?

Remember this??

AND 2004??

You probably don't, but despite the fact I also don't give a shit about you anymore, I still remember, and I just wanna say...

FUCK YOU ADAM.

FUCK

YOU!!


Of ALL THE DAYS you could've chose, you chose THAT ONE???  I'm not pissed that you got married, cuz I know you were already legally married before this, but how could you even dare have your wedding with them THE SAME DAY WE MET IN 2004 AND THE SAME DAY YOU PROPOSED TO ME IN 2007???!?!?  That is the most inconsiderate hateful thing you could ever do to our memory.  I know our relationship was a mistake.  Trust me, no one thinks that more than I do.  But it was a still a memory.  A part of our past, a part of what made us who we are today individually, and this is how you treat it??  Even I wouldn't have done this with Ray.  How would you like it if I married Ray on May 23rd?  Would you like that??

I hated you before, but now I can't even stand the sight of you.  And here I thought that things were slightly better between us this year.  Now you've gone and officially fucked it up with your ignorance.  Or was it ON PURPOSE??  Was it a personal fuck you towards me??

I have never hated you more than I hate you now.  You can go straight to hell.  And here I thought you had actually somewhat changed.  Turns out you're a bigger asshole than ever.

I never wanna see your face ever again.  This is it.  You have betrayed me in by far the most hateful possible way.  As if you didn't hurt me enough already.  That scar you left on my heart is threatening to break open again cuz of this, and I'll be damned if I let that happen.  The only way I can prevent that is if I keep you out of my life for good now.

Goodbye.  Can't say I'll ever miss you.

May. 25th, 2015

Jade

(no subject)

Exactly 10 years ago, I started this journal.  My first ever entry is here.

God I was a crazy teen, and I can't believe I called myself a moonie lol.  Not to mention that story I wrote is long gone now.  All my poems are gone too cuz they were all about Nick and Adam at the time lol.  The only poems on there now are a handful about Phil and Ray on FP now, which the URL has been changed to TheQueenofSpace.

Amazing that it's been that long already...

Sep. 20th, 2014

it are fact

(no subject)

Under cut for random aggressive admiration over BF...Collapse )

Jul. 20th, 2014

sunset

(no subject)

I made this entry last year about the theater shooting.

It's been 2 years now, and I've realized that like last year, I was trying to push it to the back of my mind and try to forget about it.  Turns out I was only burying it more.  Even today I still have my moments where something triggers it.  A few weeks ago when I went to go see Transformers with Phil, Sean, Dan, Chris, and Eric, I was sitting down and I looked behind me and noticed the theater was nearly packed, which alone made me start to breathe heavily.  Luckily, Phil noticed and comforted me.  The other time was at Ren Fair last week, when they fired the canon at closing time.  Again, Phil put an arm around me until I was ok.  Anytime I hear the city sirens go off, it somehow reminds me of the police cars.

I realized that I needed to face that night again in my mind.  I told Ray everything tonight.  I told him about everything that happened from my experience, from the Amazing Spiderman movie earlier that day to the next day when we went to the candle vigil.  It helped immensely, and Ray was there for me every moment.  God bless him.  I know now why I survived that night.  If I hadn't, I never would've met Ray again, and we never would've fallen in love.  I'm so blessed and lucky to have him in my life now after everything we've been through.

Going back to the shooting, like last year, I lit candles for the 12 victims:



Jonathan Blunk, Alexander J. Boik, Jesse Childress, Gordon Cowden, Jessica Ghawi, John Larimer, Matt McQuinn, Micayla Medek, Veronica Moser-Sullivan, Alex Sullivan, Alexander C. Teves, Rebecca Wingo. Your souls still burn bright in our hearts <3

Jan. 7th, 2014

DERP

This song is my new anthem

The snow glows white on the mountain tonight
Not a footprint to be seen
A kingdom of isolation, and it looks like I’m the Queen
The wind is howling like this swirling storm inside
Couldn’t keep it in, heaven knows I've tried
Don’t let them in, don’t let them see
Be the good girl you always have to be
Conceal, don’t feel, don’t let them know
Well now they know

Let it go, let it go
Can’t hold it back anymore
Let it go, let it go
Turn away and slam the door
I don’t care
What they’re going to say
Let the storm rage on,
the cold never bothered me anyway

It’s funny how some distance
Makes everything seem small
And the fears that once controlled me
Can’t get to me at all
It’s time to see what I can do
To test the limits and break through
No right, no wrong, no rules for me
I’m free

Let it go, let it go
I am one with the wind and sky
Let it go, let it go
You’ll never see me cry
Here I stand
And here I stay
Let the storm rage on

My power flurries through the air into the ground
My soul is spiraling in frozen fractals all around
And one thought crystallizes like an icy blast
I’m never going back,
The past is in the past

Let it go, let it go
And I'll rise like the break of dawn
Let it go, let it go
That perfect girl is gone
Here I stand in the light of day
Let the storm rage on,
The cold never bothered me anyway

Jan. 1st, 2012

Jade

It's that Time again

Time for the End of the New Year Survey:

Oh 2011...Collapse )

Sep. 15th, 2011

squee

(no subject)

Tumblr's being a derp and won't let me post, so I'll post here for now.

Look what I got at Barnes and Noble today!

Apparently Sailor Moon is being revived internationally.  As you can see in my hands, they're re-releasing the manga series in bookstores, plus I've been seeing t-shirts (although sadly, only junior sized) in Hot Topic.  As for the anime, there's no news about it returning to US TV yet, but I plan to read the mangas as they come out.

Ahhh, my childhood :3

Jul. 23rd, 2011

Jade

Tumblr WTF?

Tumblr's being an asshole and won't let me post or reblog anything, so I guess I'll resort back to good old LJ.

Have a Tavros:


Actually it took forever to upload this.  Seems technology in general doesn't really like me today lol.

May. 25th, 2011

LOL

OMG...

I think this is one of the best Drabble-Matics I've ever made XD.  The story itself is unedited, but I changed the typing style according to each character.

Slimey Lang SyneCollapse )
it are fact

OK, SO...

Things have been pretty stressful concerning Adam's stricture problem. We have finally made an appointment with the urologist but it's not until the 31st. Considering the urgency of the situation, it seems so far away, but they said if by chance anyone cancels this week they'll try to squeeze him in. Here's to hoping that we won't have to make a 4th trip to the ER until then.

In other news, Adam and I actually had a very nice 2nd Anniversary. We got a $50 Olive Garden gift card from Titi and Uncle David and used it for our dinner yesterday :3. Later that night we went to see the Rockies game. Other than it being cold and that they lost (should've gone to the 1st game where they won 12 to 3 lol), we had a great time. They were serving hot chocolate cuz of the cold, so I got some and it hit the spot just right! We had had so much food yesterday (Olive Garden salad, breadsticks, soup, chicken alfredo, hot dogs and nachos and a funnel cake at the game) we felt like we were going to explode XD, but it was totally worth it :3.

Also, I passed all my classes this semester! I just now sent an email to the heads of the visual arts department to see if i can get away with graduating in fall. Keep your fingers crossed!

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